I was closing out a session with my therapist (therapy is life changing; if you’re not doing it, please consider it!). She gently reminded me that at our next session, she wants to see me sporting ‘non-safe’ earrings. She wanted to see me taking more fashion risks and being expressive with my fashion choices. Why? 

Because I’ve been sharing with her that my style has been repressed for too long, leaving me feeling frustrated, and – frankly – bland. For example, I’ve been wanting to play around with my hair through color and experimenting with styles. However, working in a corporate 9-5 didn’t allow for that. To add, I was *telling* myself that I couldn’t even attempt to experiment or push the envelope because of perceived repercussions I could face.

She’s been helping me tackle both sides of that coin, especially the latter which I have more control over than the former. But let’s start with the former —

Working a “Traditional” Job

Since being away from my job, I have been constantly reminded by friends and supporters that I can do WHAT I want, WHEN I want and HOW I want. This means I can wear what I want, styled however I want, and for whatever reason I want.

I feel so FREE, yall.

But the obvious reality -that is hitting closer to home than I thought now that I’m away from the job – is that when working in corporate, you do not have free reign. You have to dress professionally, based on the standards of your own company. In other words, you’re under constraints. Now some may believe that that’s just the ‘cost of doing business’ sorta speak. I don’t subscribe to that because it doesn’t align with who I am and what I value. 

I value freedom and choice and the ability to express myself via my appearance and I don’t want to feel boxed in.

Conjuring Up Things In Your Head

While the workplace imposed restrictions on me (along with everyone else), I imposed them on myself as well. My therapist would ask “Why can’t you wear more expressive clothes to work?” I didn’t have a valid, concrete reason. I assumed I couldn’t and, therefore, didn’t want to risk experimenting. However, I should have trusted myself more to take more calculated risks. It could have been so simple as allowing myself to wear more colors.

It’s almost surreal but I’m learning to embrace it. Can I say this again?

I feel FREE.

So far, I purged quite a few pieces that didn’t serve me anymore and listed many on my Poshmark closet. I’ve also added highlights to my hair, am rocking bolder lip shades, I’m wearing more colors and playing around with jewelry and accessories. 

Soon I’ll be getting my nose pierced (something I’ve been talking about doing for 20 years, no joke!). This is only the beginning and I’m open and ready for the journey. 

What have you always wanted to do? Are you holding yourself back because of things you’ve made up in your head that aren’t necessarily true? How are you going to take more fashion risks?